Tried and True... Broken-In Mommy

Every now and then I feel as if I'm being tested - by my kids, by my husband, by the powers that be - to see if I'm really cut out for this mommy business.

Luckily, I always pass. So far.

These past two weeks have been a little rough. Beckham had three days of being sick where he not only felt miserable with a fever of 103, but was also throwing up. Jordan happened to be working on-call at the hospital the entire time, which seems to always be the case when something is going terribly wrong at home. As I tried to keep my 4-year-old hydrated and cooled off and well-rested, I was toting around a happy baby on my hip. As soon as she would go down for a nap, there I was scrubbing vomit off of floors and walls and toilets and doors, and sanitizing the entire house in hopes that nobody else would catch the bug he had. I spent night after night caring for a sick child, feeling so absolutely helpless that he had to feel so miserable and wishing I could magically make him feel better. I slept by his side, I catered to his every need, and at one point got teary-eyed because I felt so overwhelmed with love for this kid. I really would do ANYTHING for him.

As soon as he was feeling better, I was rushing to quickly put together the Joy School Christmas Party and Kindergarten Readiness Lessons for the week as well as preparing for the party we were throwing at our house that weekend. The day of the Joy School Christmas Party, one girl showed up to my house absolutely plagued with illness! She was coughing a hoarse, raspy cough the entire time as goop ran down her face. Since she's only 3, bless her heart, she would cough on everyone around her as she walked by, wipe her nose with her hands before touching all of the toys and craft supplies, etc... without realizing that I stood there wincing each time, praying that my children would stay healthy and wouldn't get sick again. The next day I frantically cleaned my house and had a little Christmas get-together with some local friends. Then, two to three days later we all suddenly have horrible colds with fevers.

Now my baby has that hoarse, raspy cough and runny nose with a fever that seems identical to the symptoms displayed by the 3-year-old girl at my house that day and I find myself ranting on the inside about how parents should not send their sick kids to other people's houses to get an entire family sick! (Which I would never say out loud because I know these things happen and I love their sweet family and would never want to offend them - and can safely type it here because they'll never see this blog :)

So, now I'm taking care of a coughing 4-year-old and a sick-as-can-be 11-month-old WHILE I'm also sick and I'm wondering if this is MY test this week and I can't help but laugh at the irony. Last week I passed the test of taking care of one sick child while juggling a healthy child and household responsibilities on very little sleep and I think I may have become a little prideful after mastering this feat. Now things have been kicked up a notch and I'm taking care of two sick children while I'm sick myself still running on very little sleep while running around preparing for Christmas.

So, Santa, if you're out there, all I want for Christmas this year is a full night's sleep and a healthy family. If you can give me that, I promise I'll stop whining and complaining about how tired and achey and sick I am and be a good mommy all year long.

merry christmas everyone

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Years and Years of Dedication, Hard Work, Sacrifice....

Tonight, as everyone else was going to bed for the night, I watched as Jordan changed into his work clothes to pull a 10-12 hour graveyard shift in the Emergency Room down in Fairfax, dealing with drug addicts, drug-seekers, detox and overdoses, bar fight patients, vaginal bleeding, suicide attempts, kids with fevers and coughs and diarrhea, lacerations, you name it. All the while he helps these patients to the best of his ability, using vast medical knowledge with great confidence and know-how, trudging through the late night and wee hours of the morning, helping patient after patient, always with a great attitude.

Like all residents, he does this while getting reamed by some know-it-all attending who has something to prove by being a jerk. After hours and hours of this, Jordan drives home, exhausted, in the morning rush hour traffic of D.C. for 2 hours. He gets home, crashes on the couch in the basement for awhile, wakes up, eats, studies, and starts all over again with another 10-12 hour graveyard shift.

I cannot accurately express to you how much dedication, hard work, and sacrifice goes into this career. He worked so hard for four years as an undergrad to get the top grades, taking the hardest science classes, volunteering at hospitals, passing the MCAT, while working a full-time job... all of this just to get his foot in the door and get into medical school. Once in medical school, he was waking up at the crack of dawn to study for upcoming board exams before going to class all day, taking a brief 10 minute break for dinner, and then studying all night for exams for his classes. Weekends included. During 3rd and 4th year rotations, he spent a total of 5 months living away from home. He worked extremely hard while simultaneously studying for boards. After passing board exams and getting through those years of medical school, he got into his dream specialty: Ophthalmology.

So, here we are in the inevitable Internship year. 80-hour work weeks. On call every 3rd night. 30-hour shifts without a break, sometimes even without a meal. This man goes to work each and every day making a difference in many lives with a smile on his face. He cares about helping them. When he comes across something he doesn't have the answer for, he comes home from his long shift and studies about it. He has been going to school and studying HARD for years just so he can help his patients. He doesn't do it for the paycheck. He doesn't do it for the recognition. He does it because he is a caring doctor. And I'm willing to bet that he's not the only one. I know doctors get a bad rap sometimes - people tend to think they are overpaid for what they do. I can tell you here, they are NOT. Doctors sacrifice their youth to study. They pay for a solid education and live below the poverty line as students for 8 full years of school. They get overworked while being seriously underpaid all throughout their residencies and training years. Once they do get a paycheck, they get to pay off years worth of medical school student loans. Aside from the fiduciary sacrifices, they sacrifice their time with their loved ones. They sacrifice sleep, proper nutrition, recreation, any semblance of a normal life. I have watched Jordan work so hard for the past 8 years and am amazed at this level of dedication and sacrifice. It is hard on an individual and on a family. We move a lot, we live like students with the bare minimum, my kids rarely see the father they love as he's out sewing up some guy who got in a fight or counseling a drug-seeker.

He never complains about his long hours. He works nights, weekends, holidays... never complaining. And I realize that every doctor out there has gone through what my husband is going through. I don't think I ever appreciated that fact to the full extent until witnessing it first-hand. Where would our society be without these dedicated men and women? This does not only go for doctors for that matter. I know there are other professionals out there that dedicate so much for a good cause. But, for the sake of personal experience, let me just say, DOCTORS WORK SO DAMN HARD! I love my husband. He has such a great attitude. He is so intelligent and hard-working, but he doesn't give himself enough credit for this. He just goes on day after day working hard, providing for his family, changing lives. In fact, he'd probably be downright embarrassed reading this because for him it is all out of duty. He doesn't do it to be recognized. He does it out of duty.

I got a letter on my door the other day, left by the garbage man, telling us who to make our check out to in order to tip none other than the same garbage man that left the note. I am happy to tip my garbage man, don't get me wrong, but I chuckled a little and thought of a great line from The Office:

Dwight: "Why tip someone for a job I'm capable of doing myself? I can deliver food. I can drive a taxi. I can, and do, cut my own hair. I did however, tip my urologist, because I am unable to pulverize my own kidney stones."

Well said, Dwight. Well said. :) Not that you should start tipping your doctor, by all means! But I do wish more people would appreciate their doctors instead of complaining about how much money doctors make. Yes, some doctors out there make a lot of money... after, 8 years of school + 4 or more years of residency + 10 years minimum to pay off medical school loans = 22 years or so of dedication, sacrifice on every level and really, really hard work. Okay, I'm done with my rant.